Dreams & Visions

To describe all dreams here or even to write them in here would go beyond the scope. (There is already a subpage here that deals explicitly with it. Therefore I will only briefly tell you a few). Visions, on the other hand, are shorter. Images appearing in the mind's eye are rare. When I was still in regular contact with the allies, I had a few. Starting with that vision of the angel who came to take the soldier2 to a place that is not in this world. (And as it turned out later, that angel was me. Because later someone will describe me exactly as that angel. But we'll get to that later.)

Or the angel who appeared to me on the street. She waved at me and I was amazed. Such a clear picture of an angel... She seemed me so known and trusted. (It turned out to be an ally who died after a short serious illness. She had come to say goodbye.) Vision 3 was cruel.

It is a habit to sleep when the body calls for it. I was tired and exhausted and just wanted to get some rest. So I lay down on my bed and first stared into the darkness, then closed my eyes. And suddenly saw a bright light in front of my eyes and shortly after that a shadow in the light, which looked like a man coming towards me. I opened my eyes for a moment and closed them again. Again there was this bright light and the shadow of this man rested on what appeared to be a sword (I couldn't make out exactly what it was). I opened my eyes... "what does that mean?" and closed my eyes again. Again the light came and the shadow was crouched in front of a field or whatever and in front of him there was a shovel stuck in the ground. I opened my eyes and closed them, but now the spook was over. No matter how many times I closed and opened my eyes, the light and shadow were gone. Only the image or images stayed in my head...

The worst part is/was... I had an inkling of what it meant and theoretically my guess was correct. But it came differently than seen/assumed. Because the guess was soldier3 is the man from the vision. I told him what I had seen. Just a few weeks later...on New Year's Eve 2018...it was just after midnight when a strange feeling came over me. From one moment to the next everything was different. I felt at that moment that something had happened. 3 days later I found out. The soldier's brother3 also a soldier, fell in action. It tore the ground from under my feet.

continuation ...

But there were and are also times when I didn't see/saw nothing and didn't dream/dream anything. When these periods lasted too long, I became restless. But such phases now usually only last a few days. It is a short time to relax and recharge your batteries. And I need that time. For this reason, you should NEVER wish me "(sweet) dreams". On the one hand my dreams are rarely positive and on the other hand I need these "dream breaks" as described above. So sometimes I'm very happy when I can sleep and not dream.

Getting back to the story... 3 months later I made another "mistake". A mistake that I was not aware of as such! I saw the consequence coming in the dream and was shocked. However, since I was still not ready to interpret my dreams correctly, I had no idea what was really to come.

At the end of the day, exactly what I had dreamed came true. And I was "judged", for a fact which I had not committed. Indirectly, I was even blamed for the soldier's death. Because he died because of me. As I later learned, he had fallen in love with me even though he knew I loved his brother. Feelings are taboo. Because they distract in action. He was distracted ... Because his thoughts were with me and he wanted to leave the unit after the Mission to be with me. I didn't find out about all this until much later.

From that point on, my fight for truth and justice began! The "mistake" was avoidable and I had not made it consciously. I would never have betrayed anyone on purpose! I wouldn't do that today either! I keep many secrets! Many many!!

But it was what it was and I had to suffer badly from it for a long time. Again a period of doubt began and I did not notice myself leaving my path. I questioned everything. My skills, my gift, my "allies". I was angry and sad at the same time.

And then I met an angel. We chatted and he revealed to me that he knew I was an angel. It was his job to guide me back to the right path. With his words of wisdom he opened my eyes and led me back on my path. Suddenly I saw everything from a completely different perspective. And I saw my "allies" with different eyes. I wasn't sad anymore. No, I was angry. Because I wasn't to blame for anything. Yes, I had made an avoidable mistake. Yes, I bore the consequences. No, I didn't betray ANYONE! I was the perfect "scapegoat" in the mess, in the chaos that prevailed there! Because I'm a civilian!

I fought for a long, long time. But I had to go my way. My path that was predetermined for me. I wasn't one of them. No Black Angel. Because my gift and my abilities were given to God. Everything reveals itself to me out of nowhere when the time comes. There's no point in putting pressure on me. I calmed down over time, trusting my intuition. The self-doubt slowly disappeared. And I learned.

I began to deal with the origin of the soul. Learned things about myself. Where I came from, what I am. There was no longer any doubt about it. I am an angel on earth. Emerged from an incarnated angel and a sage! And with this realization it was time for the next encounter!

In the following it should turn out how right I was! I met Jan (now deceased). It took some time and as he gave me his trust he started to tell me his story and in my mind's eye I saw all the things that connected us. My intuition had never failed me... So he told me that at the lowest point in his life he wanted to take his own life by getting drunk and then went into the lake hoping to drown in it. But he didn't drown! He was found unconscious but alive on the other side of the lake. It was thanks to his dog that he was found, who had left the house with him unnoticed. But the dog wasn't the one that saved him. Jan could not answer this question how he could survive until this day* herself. (*By this I mean the time of our meeting, since he is now deceased)

I could it! Because it was in his story that I first realized what our connection was. It was the water and with that realization I realized again that the water was always the connection to "allies". Every "ally" had a negative relationship with water. Next I saw who had saved him. No, it wasn't me! Because at that point we didn't know each other. He has saved himself! Body, mind and spirit were not yet ready to go. They fought by making him fight.

After his suicide attempt, he was hospitalized for a while. During this time, he had a lot of time to think and always sought out a place of rest and peace. He told me that this place was a cemetery and that whenever he was there, the dead would speak to him and ask him to accompany them. It wondering him. How could he hear the dead? What happened here? He couldn't explain it.

Whenever he was there, they came to him. But the more time passed and the better he felt, the calmer the dead became. Until one day they disappeared completely. It surprised him and he didn't know how to explain it. But suddenly there were answers to all his questions.

I realized that he was an "other" an "ally". But he was different from those I had met before.

He was one of the few who recognized what I am without me telling him. And he was the first to see and describe this angel that I am. He met this angel in a dream. In this dream he roamed through a forest as his power animal, the wolf. When he suddenly saw me, the angel. I, this angel, was all in white and I had very large white wings.(!) Somehow this meeting of the two of us reminded of a fairy tale. But it soon turned out that it wasn't a fairy tale! Also in his dream I saw things that he could not see. I was on my way to a place of very great importance. I call this place, place of light. Jan the wolf offered to take me there. After hearing what he said, I didn't want to accept his "offer" at first. But then I decided to do it anyway to get to the place faster.